When I was eight years old I attended my first overnight summer camp. I loved the archery, arts & crafts, horseback riding and canoeing. But most of all I loved to swim! The camp had an annual mile long swim across the very large lake in the north west corner of the lower peninsula of Michigan.
I still remember the name of my cabin mate, Susan Wade. She and I asked to take the challenge joining the older campers who were going to swim the mile. I think it was a little more like pleading and begging them to let us do it. The life guard, instructors decided we were strong enough to make the distance. They always kept a boat in the water with the swimmers the entire way, just in case.
Did we make it? Yes! Susan and I set the camp record for the youngest campers to ever complete the mile. That is saying something since my mom had attended the same camp as a young girl! Our names joined the other milers from every preceding year with our names on a plaque in the camp meeting hall.
As a proud “miler” I determined at the ripe old age of eight, that my life goal was to become a Red Cross certified “WSI,” a Water Safety Instructor. For the next decade I set my sights on achieving the Red Cross standards as soon as my age allowed.
Fast froward: Age seventeen. I was in the diving pool of Huron High School in Ann Arbor. Imagine underwater wrestling, learning to rescue a swimmer in distress. I was exhausted and trilled! I had just successfully completed my final requirement for my WSI. I was fully qualified! The view from the “summit” was rewarding!
The funny thing is, by the time I was dressed and walked to my car, a sense of loneliness or almost defeat came over me. I had achieved my “Life Goal!” I was only 17! I felt empty, hollow. There has to be more to life than this!?! I knew I was young, but this hollow feeling marked me for life.
What’s next?
Do I set another goal? I don’t especially like this feeling of “after achievement.” In the moment of victory over rigorous standards and self, it feels great! But it doesn’t satisfy for long.
At that point in life I was a baby follower of Jesus. It took me nearly four more years to realize that the only satisfaction that truly lasts is in walking daily with God. For years I have been learning to allow the love of God to become my goal and fulfillment. I have learned to plug into His strength and acceptance in the let down moments of “after achievement” and well as in the victories and the defeats.
The camp is gone now. My plaque burned or perhaps rotted under the foundation of one of the condo’s that have gone up on the sight. My WSI? I never used it for a job as a life guard or anything else. My strong willed children, who were very reluctant home schoolers for the few months home schooling was necessary, also rebuffed most of my attempts to teach them to swim.
I have learned, the point of a goal is less about the goal and more about the process. As I lean on God and learn the ways of God, His hand and His heart of love guide me.
At each “what next?” in my life, God meets me.
These times are excellent for re-evaluation. They are also good to reflect upon and receiving the approval of God; His love, delight and even pride, in my following Him as faithfully as I can. [As Paul said in Phil. 3:12 “Not that I have already obtained this or am already perfect, but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own.”]
The emptiness of the “after achievement” is largely gone these days. In stead, it is usually replaced with a sense of the anticipation of yet another adventure. There is always another journey with another summit.
Abba gives me the strength and wisdom to “run through the finish line.” He also holds the plans for my future. God is actually more engaged in us finding the way forward than we are, so we can relax, at least a bit=}. As we faithfully complete the thing He has put in front of us today, we never have to worry about our significance or my, “What’s next?”
I know many people who currently find themselves at a place of “what next?” Are you among us?
Are you tired, afraid? hopeful? lost or confused? Something else? Ask Abba for a sanctified imagination, then ask Him to show you how you are trusting Him and how you are not. Don’t get introspective, but just ask. If you ask sincerly, He will find a way that you can hear. Listen for His still mall voice. Give God the things He asks for, like fear or confusion. Then ask what he wants you to have in their place? Such as love and as sound mind, taking each thought captive to Christ.
Next, with a sanctified imagination, ask Abba God how He really sees you. listen as He places words of loving affirmation in your mind. Don’t push these good words aside as “mere self talk.” Let them sink into your being.
Be blessed to know you are eternally loved by the Creator of all things!
